Early to Rise

Getting up at 5am was something I wasn't looking forward to when going back to work. I'm more of a night owl so early mornings do not come easy for me. I can, however, function on little amounts of sleep so I had that going for me at least. Although Friday had been a more reasonable call time (10am), it was a very busy day for me. I guess in a way it was good to hit the ground running, but I had also been worried I might have trouble focusing. My job is a very detail oriented one so being able to focus for 12 hours is essential. I found on Friday that by being so busy all day I hadn't been able to stop to think about Nolan or focus my attention on anything other than keeping up with the work at hand. The show I had been on prior to Nolan's birth had been a feature film and thus moved at a much slower pace than TV. Needless to say, Friday went off without a hitch and the work day was over before I knew it.

Monday was a different story. The morning looked to be fairly slow for me as we were only shooting one scene before moving locations so there was no chance of block shooting multiple scenes at one time. On top of the prospect of a slow morning, I also had to be at work at 6:30am. I don't think I have been up at that hour since I was in the hospital having Nolan. I had become quite used to sleeping in until 9am. My late morning wake ups were partly due to my inability to sleep well at night. It was usually well in to the wee hours of the morning before I could manage to go to sleep. I don't know why exactly I had such a hard time sleeping at normal hours for it definitely wasn't for lack of being tired. In fact, it seemed as though I was always tired these days. As I mentioned before, staying in bed all day would have been a very easy alternative for me. I could now understand why some people succumb to this option. It's the easy way out. Some days it was all I could do to force myself out of bed at any decent time. Now work was forcing me out of bed. At least sleeping all day would not be an option I could legitimately contemplate for any length of time.

So this morning when my multiple alarms went off at 5am, I jumped out of bed after only a mere 4 hours of sleep. Ugh. This day was going to be rough. Surely, I would be ready for a nap by mid morning. It did prove to not be as draining of a day as I had originally expected. I suppose after the months of emotionally draining day, work was a welcomed diversion. Now I was just mentally exhausted at the end of the day which is much easier of a time than being emotionally spent. I only had one moment early in the day when one of our actors came up to me and told me he had just heard about my news over the weekend. He gave me a big hug and told me how sorry he was to hear about my loss. Other than that, it was work as usual. Maybe I can do this after all. It seems as Marshall was right. Work was a bit cathartic. Work kept me busy throughout the day and gave me something to focus my mind on. Now if I could only get used to the early risings.