Nolan Eason

At 1:03AM on Friday, March 30, 2012 my first child was born - a son. We named him Nolan Eason. 21" long, 5lb 3oz. He was beautiful and perfect in every way, except that he was stillborn. As we searched for answers to his untimely death, we also searched for comfort. This blog was created as a way of working through my sorrow by trying to find something beautiful in the world each day. Hopefully, along the way it will help others to heal as well.

Monday, November 26, 2012

The Rockettes

I had the breakfast of champions this morning - a cupcake I had gotten at Magnolia bakery last night. Yum. It gave me just the sugar rush I needed to get me going this morning. We then headed down to Time Square to meet my family at their hotel. My cousins and aunt went to the wax museum Madame Tussauds in Time Square while Mom, Marshall and I walked around Time Square. We headed to Starbucks first to grab some coffee then into the Levi Jeans Store for Marshall to go shopping. He's been looking for a specific pair of pants and finally found them in that store so he was excited about that. It was getting lunch time and they were still at the wax museum, so we headed to Virgil's for some North Carolina style barbecue while we waited for them to finish.


By the time we finished lunch, they were done with the museum so we all hopped on the bus tour and headed downtown to see the Statue of Liberty. Due to the hurricane, you weren't able to go see the Statue of Liberty so we could only see it from afar. From there we walked over to the 9-11 memorial but weren't able to go see it because we didn't have tickets for today. So I went online and got us tickets for tomorrow morning and then we took the subway to Grand Central and then Time Square.





It was dinner time by this point so we grabbed dinner at Tad's Steaks. I ordered my steak well done, but part of it was slightly pink. Marshall got overly concerned that it wasn't cooked properly despite the fact that I didn't eat any of the pink parts. I know he is just concerned about the baby, but it really upset me because he just went on and on about it. In a lot of ways I still feel like it is my fault what happened to Nolan so when I get criticized about something I'm doing or not doing during this pregnancy it really upsets me. It makes me feel like if something goes wrong this time it is going to be because of that damn steak or something else I did. I feel like I'm doing everything I can to make sure this baby is healthy and it's all the same things, if not more, than I did last time. I haven't had any caffeine the entire pregnancy. I stick my finger 4 times a day checking my glucose levels even though I still haven't been diagnosed with gestational diabetes this year. I don't eat deli meat, soft cheeses, or the array of fish. I'm so on the extreme of what not to do that most pregnant women look at me like I'm crazy for not partaking in anything of the no no list. I probably wouldn't have gotten so upset if I wasn't full of hormones, but I do find I'm overly sensitive these days.

After dinner we walked over to Radio City Music Hall to go to the Rockettes show. We got there an hour early so we took some time to take some pictures in front of the ornaments in the fountain before getting in line to head in to the show. Once they opened the doors and we were able to go in, Rylee and I headed downstairs to go to the bathroom. When we came out we found Marshall, Mom, Aunt Jo and Ashley had come downstairs too. We all ended up grabbing some drinks and candy for the show before heading back upstairs to find our seats.

The show was great! The bus moving around the stage was really cool. They did the Nutcracker with giant teddy bears instead of people. It seemed like everyone enjoyed the show. Part of it was in 3D as in between live performances they would show an animated film.


After the show we walked over to Rockefeller Center so Ashley and Rylee could go ice skating. Marshall and Aunt Jo went walking around to find coffee with no luck. Marshall said he enjoyed his "Aunt Jo" time though despite the fact that they went to four Starbucks and they were all closed! The girls had a great time ice skating and I have to admit I was a bit envious of them. Oh well, I guess we will just have to come back some time when I'm not pregnant so I can go ice skating then.

When the girls were done ice skating Marshall directed them on how to get back to their hotel and Marshall walked me back to our hotel. My cousin Jay was a block away from our hotel having a late dinner with some of his friends so Marshall decided to stop by and see him for a minute before heading up to bed. He met Jay's friend Rob, his son and his girlfriend who apparently is a big Homeland fan. Jay told Marshall he was hoping I would have been up for coming out as she really wanted to meet me since I worked on that show. I, however, was busy enjoying my shower. By the time I had finished and had just sat down in bed to watch some TV, Marshall came in. We both were ready to just lounge on the bed and watch a movie. Tomorrow was our last full day in New York so we have to make the most of it.




















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